college talk

Sometimes I can't tell whether or not I believe in myself. I think it has to do with being mid-transition of becoming more optimistic than pessimistic. I'm realistic but recently my life's been infiltrated with good doses of happiness and hope for better. Pretty cool, except it's kind of late for a change...but luckily I don't believe there's ever such a thing as too late. Perhaps in the sense of making a difference to colleges, but in the long-run, it can't be too late.

Last night a few of us stayed up until 2am talking about colleges and the process and SATs and stuff of the sort. I'm comfortable talking about it since I've spent 5+ years of my life consumed by it (thank you, big brother), but it freaks me out to no end. I'm better about the whole thing than I used to be, since I've accepted that I'll have fun wherever I end up, but I still want to do my best...I'm honestly really jealous of one of my friends; she took a year of leave for medical reasons and got a re-do of her sophomore year. Though it may not be ethical to be jealous since I know that that time was extremely difficult for her--the things I would do to restart high school, even if that meant giving up two years of my life...Wow.

Anyway school starts in a few, and it's time to make sure my reinventions really kick in. I think I can get through with this. I'm excited to showcase these changes in myself :)